I’m Worried About Mitt Romney’s Liver

This is a bus ad that is currently rolling through the streets of Washington, DC:

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“Do You Know If Your Liver is Healthy?”

It’s paid for by the Department of Health and is sending a very clear and important message: Mitt Romney just ate the world’s biggest Flaming Hot Dorito, and damn! Does he feel fantastic!

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But seriously. I rarely snap photos out my car window; with the exception of two sightings: A dog on a walk with a stuffed animal in its mouth and a blatant infringement on the likeness of Mitt Romney. There’s no doubt that this is a Lichtensteined photo of Mitt. The khakis, the sleeves, the hair, the CRISP WHITE UNDERSHIRT?! I did a lazy Google search and found no affiliation between Mr. Romney and the Department of Health, not even on the Hep campaign.

So that leaves me to believe there is only one possible explanation for all this: Mitt Romney is running for President in 2016 and this is his campaign bus. His platform is complicated: Not sure if his liver is red with failure or sparkling with good health. Or maybe he’s showing that his heart is big and twisted? I can’t quite figure out why his internal organs are involved at all, but you know what? He looks like a guy who can just get. stuff. done. And he’s probably not afraid to talk candidly about the real issues of the day: alcoholism, Psoriasis, sexually transmitted Hepatitis, transplants, Jaundice, Hep B vaccines, dialysis, foie gras. So even though his tour bus is only focused on a half-mile radius in upper NW Washington, DC and his staff seems disinterested and low energy, I think I can get behind this.

So long as I can make some improvements to the overall campaign message:

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